A little vulgar rhyme about New Year 2018

M not drunk constantly unlucky

I'm kind of unbridled and vulgar
Soon there will be a new New Year
And I am still ashamed of the past!

***
ABOUT I opened my eyes, but I see nothing,
I try to breathe but I can't
What's with my mouth? - he is also immobilized,
This, damn it, you do not wish for the enemy!
Panic trying to understand what's going on
What a misfortune could have happened to me
To this my memory does not find an answer,
It looks like I'm not going to get along with my brain right now.
I strained all my muscles, got up and oh, a miracle!
I see again; I see a table, a window, a chair,
And then I realized, seeing the dish in front of me,
That in the New Year's salad I fell asleep !!!

IN Seh Marine, Alyon and Mash,
Ol, Tatyan, Irin, Natash,
Val and Dash and Katherine
(just right to take aspirin!)
Vic, Angel, Karin and All
(at least who would give Viagra?) -
Happy New Year,
I wish you happiness, joy
Sex for everyone, love in full! ..
All. The end. The wife came.

H new year's eve
Careless and passionate
We play with the reins
Do not feel sorry for my kingdom
For New Year's Eve!

Did not agree on the rank
Champagne are married
Dashing men
Desirable women.

In mirrored toys
Instants sparkle
And souls float
In the bliss of oblivion.

And in the morning the cracker
Wakes up desire
Find under the pillow
Love and attention.

***
D they say, for the New Year,
Whatever you want
All one thing will happen -
All around are drinking themselves!

***
H New year every year comes on me.
This time it came very hard. It happens...

***
ABOUT we celebrate the holiday in the old fashioned way,
Let the costs be great
Gifts bought at the market
And packed in bags

The tree is ready for vesting
In a shiny festive outfit
Garlands a dim glow
Slender color range of salads

To the beat of a cheap guitar
Accompanied by a trumpet
Who will be congratulated with light steam,
Whom - with the irony of fate

Observing the solemnity of the moment
And the New Years protocol,
Let's hear the "sound" from the President,
And, with a clear conscience, at the table

Where is the clink of glasses with "semi-sweet"
Year after year, for decades,
Shampoo and chocolate for you
Me - chocolate and "Gillette"

Overloaded with fun
And throwing off the "silk" of their clothes,
I will lead you to bed
Captivated by unrealizable hopes

And they will sound like a slap on the head
Sacramental words:
- Put the salads in the refrigerator,
Sorry, I'm tired ... Head ...

***
AND rony of fate, in short

Actually, on New Year's Eve, everything was
Love is a carrot and with light steam,
And some Pavlik is to blame for everything,
Which is going to Leningrad, to the woman.

But men, the right people,
They first flooded into the bath,
And gorged on beer and vodka
Gathered together to celebrate the holiday with respect.

And now, getting drunk in the trash and with a naked torso,
We sang a song about the taiga and airplanes
And as a result of this booze
They were all very hard-headed.

In short, after, in the airport,
They all lapped up brandy
And instead of Pavlik in the Yak-40
Drunk Zhenya got in the ass.

And Ryazanov was on the plane,
I was doing crosswords with glasses,
And drunken Zhenya with a broom under his arm,
All the time I fell from the chair stupidly.

As soon as the liner landed,
Zhenek rolled off the ramp awkwardly,
I got into a taxi and gave the address
And then everything started spinning.

In short, I ended up in Leningrad
The same address as in the capital.
And the house and the key, which is typical,
Everything turned out to be identical.

Drunken Zhenya climbed under the covers,
And he began to snore like a locomotive at the start.
And then the front door suddenly opened slightly
And the mistress of the house appeared.

Seeing a drunkard in my bed,
She was certainly very scared,
But then suddenly she became so powerfully emboldened
She grabbed the kettle and began hitting Zhenya in the face.

Zhenek, of course, swore powerfully,
Shouted about a screen, a flower bed and an apartment,
What, they say, who are you a bitch,
And, like, I live here with my mom.

Then, in general, the man pinned himself,
He introduced himself as Hippolytus,
In a coat like that, and businesslike,
Came on a red penny.

Well, Nadka was trying to get out here,
Where, they say, the man is drunk here.
Handed Hippolytus a razor
New models with self-cleaning system.

But Hippolytus was very vicious,
I got drunk and got into the bath
Throwing soap sprinkled on the floor
And flooded the neighbors, you bastard!

Then a drunk got behind the wheel
And I drove the frozen one along the Neva.
And Zhenya sobered up a little
And immediately fell in love with Nadka.

Well, like, Hippolyte is fucked up
And these two are Zhenya and Nadezhda
Got two cool apartments.
Why is drunk just not happening?

***
H New Year has come today,
A new day is rising over the planet
I will start life as if from a clean slate,
In the early morning, so from a hundred grams ...

***
P do the job! Contingent
occupied the buffet:
tangerines-oranges,
with premium envelope ...
Chef puts it in his mouth
with sturgeon sandwich.
Here is such a picture -
hello tree, new year!

The flu is raging over the country.
Have some vodka. Eat the mushroom.
Santa Claus is on his way.
President at ten
will put the sermon on the air.
Happy new year, old world!

***
TO once on New Year's Eve we drank - ate
And we went to unwind to the New Year's tree.
The beauty! Around lights, music, familiar
You move away from some, new ones come up here!
In general, somehow I lagged behind my own people, however.
I looked around, I see a fight is nearby.

Yes, not guys, men in that fight,
Only fists flashed and hats flew off.
But the PPP arrived and the guys in uniform
All the fighters were loaded into the PAZ throughout the proforma.
The peasants sniffed, but did not resist,
And, trampled in the snow, their hats were lying around.

Well then I gathered them quickly into an armful
And I knock on the door with my foot: "Take your hats!"
The door opened this moment, and me - for what ?!
Young handsome cop dragged into the bus.
"Let go! It's not like that! I'm for hats!"
The cop showed me his fist: shut up, they say, uncle.

Hats, just went to the department, were taken away immediately.
"So, and for what?" - "How for what? For theft!"
Before I had time to open my mouth, all of us went to the "monkey house"
And there was such a people there - you can immediately see - a holiday!
A young intellectual with a rose handle,
Uncle, important as an assistant professor, two Santa Claus!

They took out the fighters, protocol, questions.
Only they, in the end, were released all the same.
Men don't leave, which is quite understandable:
They ask the caps that are lying to get back.
The attendant says to them: "These hats are stolen!"
But they keep repeating: "These hats are ours!"

"A passer-by picked them up ... He did not leave with the find ...
Because of us he got here ... There he is, behind bars! "
The captain opened the door for me, sober and in parade
"Well, tell me now, everything in order" ...
I am in detail, about everything, not sparing colors,
Here he saved hats for people, and to the police station!
Oh, the captain laughed, and so did the attendant.
Even men and Santa Clauses were laughing!

Bring something brought, and home on foot.
No passers-by, no taxis, the night was ending.
I left for an hour and did not take mobile phones,
And there was a commotion in the family: where was I all the time?
... I told about the miracles of New Year's Eve ...
And somewhere I lost my hat ... Mink, by the way.

***
B The clock is ticking on the Spasskaya Tower.
Congratulations to the people,
Pours vodka more often
Believes again ... in the New Year ...

***
H New Year and Santa Claus.
Santa Claus is walking in the snow
The snow crunches underfoot.
Dreams give bliss
And to the one who is fast asleep.
The doors are open before him
So that time is not wasted.
And not everyone believed in that
That bliss reigned
Santa Claus gives gifts
With New Year's generosity.
Doesn't lose its mark
Famous for selflessness.
Christmas trees shone with lights
Showing off toys.
Children, girls with guys.
We drank tea with cheesecakes.
Mom, dad, grandfather and grandmother,
We sang songs under the tree.
New Year has brought blessings
Saturating the air with tar
New year, we love you
Like Grandfather Frost.
Believe me - monogamous people.
The seed of apotheosis is in you.

FROM soon there will be a New Year -
We are ready for the holiday:
For anyone who comes
We have a bowl!

Happy New Year greetings

Do you like variety and original greetings? Then be sure to take advantage of the New Year's holiday and send your beloved or beloved a crazy and slightly vulgar congratulation. Let your significant other be pleasantly surprised by your cheerful mood and good mood for the New Year holidays. Perhaps it is an intimate New Year's greeting that will help you finally express your sincere feelings and bold desires to your loved one. Each vulgar congratulation can inflame a spark of love, passion and fire between you, as well as give your relationship a certain piquancy and intimacy. Let such congratulations become your good good tradition, because such bold speeches can only be sent to the most beloved and dear person. Read, choose and give your soul mate only the most unique, original and alluring New Year greetings!

In a red coat with a red nose,
Grandfather hu * rit in the frost.
In a hat, with a stick and with a sack,
And with a boozy snowman.
Nearby a sheep in heels
And the snow maiden on the horns.
If you meet this rabble -
So the new year is coming soon!

Luck turned backwards?
Hurry to use it -

Give this baby from the heart!
So that on New Year's Eve she would rather
I was in a hurry to give everything to you!
Well, when love does not warm -
I wish you a new one!

In the New Year, I wish you
Take a kilogram of health,
So that the dough is not less than a meter,
Fuck a lot of centimeters
More area for an apartment -
Three times! No, no - at four!
A ton of meat on the table
One hundred guests are tipsy
Hennessy to drink in the morning
Happy New Year everyone, hurray!

Dirty listen to wishes -
If life prepares punishment
Let it be with a whip and in a short skirt
Life will whip you like a joke.
If sadness comes in black stockings
Deal with her quickly too.
But seriously if, new year
Let it bring you adventure!

Luck turned backwards?
Hurry to use it -
Kohl bent in a vulgar pose,
Give this baby from the heart!
So that on New Year's Eve she would rather
I was in a hurry to give everything to you!
Well, when love does not warm -
I wish you a new one!

New Years and sex are similar.
Preparation for a whole year.
You spend money. Nerves too.
And as soon as he comes,
Pleasure is a second.
If macho - maybe five.
And again with a dream of a miracle
You start counting the days.

America is crying and Europe.
We thought about the future seriously.
They seem to be financial f * ck,
And only Russia does not care about frost.
Let's get an old accordion off the shelf,
We are no stranger to crises.
There would be lard and potatoes vodka,
We will survive again, vigorous mother!

New Year is considered one of the most beloved holidays for most people in this world.

And Happy New Year is the most popular search word on the Internet in winter.

2017 will be the year of the Rooster. Although these are oriental traditions, over the past few years we have become accustomed to jokingly focusing on them.

Therefore, we offer you New Year's greetings on the Year of the Rooster 2017, which mentions the main character of the year - the Rooster.

Year of the Rooster
Let it crow to us.
We are looking for our doors,
Paths to your dreams.
And boldly we wish
Good luck, kindness.
Let good win
The paths to it are simple.

He is proud, handsome and wayward,
It happens in the morning to bawl
He is a bird so and so, if that ...
Of course you know him!
After all, we respect the rooster,
We accept his merits,
And we are glad to meet him in Novy,
With a beautiful, proud - like this!
Happy New Year of the rooster everyone,
And happiness in life is forever!

Scrape with both paws and beak
The Rooster is ready all this year.
May he not become a fat guy
But it will never be lost.

New Year is our Rooster,
Will be greeted with a bang
After all, we love this bird,
People like him very much!
He will bring us happiness
On this snowy New Year!
I wish you all
Problem solving,
So that joy is grain by grain
You have collected in reality!

We're happy to celebrate, haha
The beginning of the Year of the Rooster! -
So that the light in your eyes does not go out,
"Ku-ka-re-ku!" - the Rooster shouts!
(And the drive so that life does not go out,
Luckily Pegasus carries us!)
We wish everyone to peck the grain -
With happiness it was so
With comfort, creative work
So that peace, goodness enter the house!
Have a Hen
(Il Petushok) at the appointed hour;
Last year flying a car,
Do not embarrass us with a boiled look,
Ah full of meat and bones
Meet guests on New Year's Eve!
And sitting at the table all together
Shrinking, laughing, as on a perch,
For the first time, maybe forever
Shouting out the window: "Ku-ka-re-ku !!!"

We see off the monkey
She crowned the year for us,
Yes, it was interesting
But not to say that without the hassle!
Well, it happens to be true
We only hope for that
That, as always and unchanged,
We will make all the dreams
So that all are fulfilled again at once,
So that the year does not let us all down,
To take the rooster away from the evil eye,
So that everyone would find himself!
I wish you a Happy New Year,
Happy year of the Rooster,
And I wish you the best
At all times in your life!

New Year has come under the sign of the Rooster:
So life will be beautiful and easy
So there will be many victories awaiting you,
So you can protect everyone from harm!

May confidence and strength be with you,
And how to live a year - decide for yourself!
After all, the Rooster will help you very much in everything,
It will even throw the whole world at your feet!

The rooster in 2017 is not just a bird,
This bird is now the head for us.
What she wants will happen
And on a holiday I wish for you:

To make everything only good come true
In order not to meet a drop of grief,
So that everything cherished is instantly fulfilled,
And always live by the number 5!

In the year of the Rooster I wish to be stately,
Do not forget about home, about family!
Put your affairs in order
To spend time with a funny song!

Be wise, deciding all your affairs,
To spend life, worries and troubles without knowing!
Successful, the first to be in all matters,
And excel in many areas!

In the year of the Rooster, I wish you:
Shiny feathers, sharp spurs,
To be respected at work
And did not enter into an argument with you!

Be bright, brave for years
But know the measure in everything
Then dreams will come true
In all that we are waiting for!

Ladies are adorned with red feathers,
The Year of the Rooster is coming
The one who is in red, his wishes come true,
I'll tell you a secret.

So come on, before the chimes,
You add red flowers to the image
And then he will endow the Rooster with a different talent,
Happy New Year, all the best and be healthy!

Sprinkle wheat by the tree,
This year she brings happiness
We all celebrate the Year of the Rooster
And he will ask about desires,

So be good
And do not be angry with the feathered friend,
May magic reign on this holiday
The snowstorm will not interfere with us!

Flies aiming, spreading its wings,
Favorite holiday - New Year,
The rooster will give us a lot of abundance,
There will be countless happiness and joy.

And the main thing is to hope and believe
Everything will be so, I assure you
New Year will open its doors
I congratulate you on the holiday!

May the year come by the cry of the Rooster
He will announce to us that troubles are nonsense,
That the meaning of life is a crimson dawn,
Therefore, do not fuss in vain,
Neither flap wings and think.
Get up on the kochet, and only from that leg;
Don't look for your adventure,
So as not to get caught like chickens in cabbage soup.
Don't give a damn about all the problems
Having so much cash that the chickens cannot eat.

Year of the Rooster, are everyone ready ?!
He is not a monkey,
He has steel spurs
And the look is also serious

He won't joke with us,
Can immediately bite on the forehead,
But don't be deceived
And only happiness will bring!

The Year of the Rooster will come very soon
May he bring money to everyone
Health and cheerful enthusiasm,
Desires to always go forward!
May plans and hopes come true
Work gives joy and success
May everything be more beautiful than before
And let happy laughter sound everywhere!

Finally he is in charge of the Rooster Year!
And he will quickly put things in order.
But, alas, you have to work all year round,
To achieve blessings, life heights.

We wish you, may success come,
So that the whole New Year was unforgettable.
The Rooster Year will become important in life.
Our brave Rooster, may you be lucky!

That the bird is proud, we know
And even though it does not fly,
And we walk all the chest with a wheel,
We call him rooster!

And his year is coming to us all,
May the best bring us
All wishes will come true
So that we remember the rooster

For a long time lay in my soul
To love the rooster!

There is a wise tale among the people
There is a golden cock in her
And again the holiday comes to us
With New Year's bustle

Let in the new year, as in an old fairy tale
Good will be in every home!
After all, the symbol of the year is not in vain
It's called the red rooster!

The rooster is very hot-tempered
Pugnacious by day, pugnacious by night,
And in the morning he is wailing
Our dream, he does not keep at all!
But we got used to his nature,
He pleases with his figure
He is handsome with a feather, and there are spurs,
For that honor and flattery!
Even in the year of the rooster,
His sign of the year descended
We will not deny everyone a dream
Happiness will arrive on earth!

Snow is flying; like white fluff.
Rooster spread its wings:
Now he is the master here!
Promises wealth and success
For everyone, especially those.
Who is young and desperate!

The Year of the Rooster is coming today
We all welcome him!
Let us have to get up with the roosters -
We will have time to try everything.

With your enthusiasm, hard work,
With enthusiasm and fearlessness, sometimes
We will like the wayward bird
And everything will be so that the feast is a mountain:

Health is in the body, wealth is in the house,
Chickens roost, and peace is in the soul.
The rooster is a fighter and it doesn't fit
We are lagging behind, so we will celebrate already!

Immediately visible - not a burdock
Our energetic cock!

I wish everyone - healthy souls and bodies,
Cloudless and promising distance,
So that the Green Rooster sang for you only in major,
And bad luck and troubles did not bite.

Let it not bite, but respect,
And let it help in everything
Today every New Year celebrates
Year of the Rooster, poems only about him,

After all, he is replacing the shaggy monkey,
And it will be difficult for me to predict
What will bring under the wing in your pocket
Trials or will we rest ?!

This bird is very beautiful,
And she will have us at dawn,
You guessed me who,
About whom we call a rooster!

A year has been hurrying him to us,
So that we are all happy
Happy New Year, I congratulate you
Good luck, I wish you happiness!

Rooster, our beautiful hero,
Your attitude is so clear to us!
Do you need to be so overstrained?
We can admire you.

I wish the Rooster on New Years -
May all the best enter your life
And may success always accompany
There will be no hindrances in life!

Let it never be sad
Any dream come true!
Do not be sad at all and do not know troubles,
And let luck flow over the edge!

Friend, I congratulate like this:
May we be lucky in the New Year!
And I'll bet a hundred dollars
That it will be so, the year will trample!
The dream will happen anyway
Let a month later, nothing.
For our success - for Petya, Roma ...
Fuck the name, for him!

May the New Year be special
Let everything in him be fucking
Let the stars fall in the palm of your hand
Any whim will come true!
May the New Year be so fucked up
May you be fucking lucky
May happiness in your heart smile
Let everything be spiteful to the enemies!

I'll fill my glasses with wine
I will make a simple toast:
So that our brains don't f ** k life,
In the new year there was only growth -
In a career, x ** is clear, in finance,
In the well-being of the family,
So no fucking romances
Our wallets did not sing!

Dirty listen to wishes -
If life prepares punishment
Let it be with a whip and in a short skirt
Life will whip you like a joke.
If sadness comes in black stockings
Deal with her quickly too.
But seriously if, new year
Let it bring you adventure!

America is crying and Europe.
We thought about the future seriously.
They seem to be financial sh **
And only Russia is bitter cold.
Let's get an old accordion off the shelf,
We are no stranger to crises.
There would be lard and potatoes vodka,
We will survive again, vigorous mother!

Let it be vulgar congratulations
On New Year's Eve, mine sounds -
But I wish, without a doubt,
May you always have ...
On the table is a bottle of vodka
So that in the company of friends,
Or pretty young
Rather, it became more fun!

In the New Fairy Year
I dream to be
In the fiery hell itself.
If only not to meet with the mother-in-law!
Give me Santa Claus
Strength and hellish patience,
So that the mother-in-law has diarrhea,
Allergies, indigestion!
The rest is nonsense.
There is money, no mind is needed.
Always ready above myself
I laugh until I drop.

In a red coat with a red nose,
Grandfather hu ** it in the frost.
In a hat, with a stick and with a sack,
And with a boozy snowman.
Nearby a horse in heels
And the snow maiden on the horns.
If you meet this rabble -
So the new year is coming soon!