09.11.202027.05.2017

Conflict (from lat. conflictus) is defined in psychology as a lack of agreement between two or more parties - individuals or groups .

History of the concept

There is a common belief that a conflict is always a negative phenomenon that causes threats, hostility, resentment, misunderstanding, that is, it is something that should be avoided whenever possible. Representatives of the early scientific schools of management also believed that conflict was a sign of ineffective organizational performance and poor management. However, nowadays management theorists and practitioners are increasingly inclined to the point of view that some conflicts, even in the most effective organization with the best employee relations, are not only possible, but desirable. You just need to manage the conflict. You can find many different definitions of conflict, but they all emphasize the presence of contradiction, which takes the form of disagreement when it comes to the interaction of people.

Classification of conflicts

Constructive (functional) conflicts lead to informed decisions and foster relationships.

There are the following main functional the consequences of conflicts for the organization:

The problem is solved in a way that suits all parties, and everyone feels involved in its solution.

A joint decision is more quickly and better implemented.

The parties gain experience of cooperation in resolving controversial issues.

The practice of resolving conflicts between a manager and subordinates destroys the so-called “submissive syndrome” - the fear of openly expressing one's opinion, which differs from the opinion of senior officials.

Relationships between people are improving.

People stop seeing disagreements as “evil,” always leading to bad consequences.

Destructive (dysfunctional) conflicts hinder effective communication and decision making.

The main dysfunctional the consequences of conflicts are:

Unproductive, competitive relationships between people.

Lack of desire for cooperation, good relations.

The idea of \u200b\u200bthe opponent as an “enemy”, his position - only as negative, and his position - as exclusively positive.

Reduction or complete cessation of interaction with the opposite side.

The belief that “winning” a conflict is more important than solving a real problem.

Feelings of resentment, dissatisfaction, bad mood.

Realistic conflicts are caused by the dissatisfaction of certain requirements of the participants or unfair, in the opinion of one or both parties, the distribution of any advantages between them.

Unrealistic conflicts aim to openly express the accumulated negative emotions, resentment, hostility, that is, acute conflict interaction becomes here not a means of achieving a specific result, but an end in itself.

Intrapersonal conflict occurs when there is no agreement between the various psychological factors of the inner world of the individual: needs, motives, values, feelings, etc. Such conflicts associated with work in the organization can take various forms, but most often it is a role conflict when various the roles of a person make different demands on him. For example, being a good family man (the role of father, mother, wife, husband, etc.), a person must spend evenings at home, and the position of a leader may oblige him to stay late at work. Here the cause of the conflict is a mismatch between personal needs and production requirements.

Interpersonal conflict is the most common type of conflict. In organizations, it manifests itself in different ways. However, the cause of the conflict is not only differences in the characters, views, and behavior of people (that is, subjective reasons), most often objective reasons lie at the heart of such conflicts. Most often it is a struggle for limited resources (material resources, equipment, production facilities, labor, etc.). Everyone believes that it is he, and not someone else, who needs the resources. Conflicts also arise between the manager and the subordinate, for example, when a subordinate is convinced that the manager makes exorbitant demands on him, and the manager believes that the subordinate does not want to work at full capacity.

Conflict between an individual and a group occurs when one of the members of the organization violates the norms of behavior or communication that have developed in informal groups. This type also includes conflicts between the group and the leader, which are most difficult when authoritarian leadership style.

Intergroup conflict - this is a conflict between formal and (or) informal groups that make up the organization. For example, between the administration and ordinary workers, between employees of various departments, between the administration and the trade union.

In any human relationship, there are disagreements from time to time. Conflict situations occur at work, in the family, and in the relationship between lovers. Many people experience them quite painfully. And completely in vain. You need to learn how to properly relate to such situations and know how to competently resolve the conflict.

Psychologists advise to treat positively - as an opportunity to clarify and even modify relationships.

Learning to resolve conflicts

If a conflict arises, it is imperative to let your partner let off steam: try to listen to all his claims calmly and patiently, without interrupting or commenting. In this case, the internal tension will decrease both for you and your opponent.

After the emotions are thrown out, you can offer to substantiate the claim. At the same time, it is necessary to monitor the situation so that the opposite side of the conflict does not again switch from a constructive discussion of problems to an emotional one. If this happens, you need to tactfully direct the debater to intellectual conclusions.

You can dampen your partner's negative emotions by making him a sincere compliment or reminding him of something good and pleasant from the common past.

Respectful attitude towards the opponent is a prerequisite for how to resolve the conflict correctly. It will impress even an extremely angry person. If, in such a situation, the partner is insulted, personalized, it will definitely not be possible to resolve the conflict.

What if the opponent could not restrain himself and switched to shouting? Do not break into reciprocal abuse!

If you feel guilty about the conflict, don't be afraid to apologize. Remember that only smart people are capable of this.

Some techniques of behavior in a conflict situation

There are several tried and tested techniques for resolving a conflict.

Reception number 1. Try to imagine yourself as a commentator watching an argument. Look at the conflict as if from the outside, and above all - at yourself.

Mentally fence off with an impenetrable cap or bulletproof vest - you will immediately feel that the barbs and unpleasant words of your opponent seem to break against the obstacle you put up and no longer hurt so sharply.

Seeing from the perspective of a commentator what qualities you lack in a conflict, endow yourself with them in your imagination and continue the argument as if you have them.

If this is done regularly, the missing qualities will indeed appear.

Reception number 2. How to resolve the conflict between the disputants? This very simple technique often helps not only to relieve tension, but also to avoid confrontation altogether. You just need to move away or move away from the enemy. The closer the conflicting parties are physically, the stronger the intensity of passions.

Reception number 3. Surprise your opponent at the moment of conflict with a non-standard phrase or joke. It's just a great way to deal with conflict. It's difficult to swear with a person who is inclined to joke!

Reception number 4. If it is absolutely clear that the interlocutor deliberately provokes a conflict, insults and simply does not give a chance to answer, in such a situation it is better to leave, saying that you do not want to continue the conversation in this tone. Better to postpone it "for tomorrow".

Taking time out will calm you down, get some breathing space to find the right words. And the person who provoked the quarrel will lose his confidence during this time.

What should not be allowed in a conflict

Good self-control is the key to successful

You need to learn to restrain emotions and In a conflict with partners or clients, it is strictly prohibited:

irritable tone and swearing;
a clear demonstration of their own superiority;
criticism of the opponent;
looking for negative intentions in his actions;
disclaiming responsibility, blaming the partner for everything;
ignoring the interests of the opponent;
exaggeration of their role in the common cause;
pressure on "painful spots".

The best way to get out of a conflict is not to bring it up.

Psychologists advise treating conflict as a positive factor. If at the very beginning of building relationships, noticing conflict moments, do not hush them up, you can nip serious quarrels in the bud.

It is necessary to try to "extinguish the fire" even before it flared up. Therefore, the best way to resolve a conflict is not to bring it up. Indeed, there are already a lot of difficulties in life, and nerve cells will still come in handy.

The accumulation of unspoken negativity often becomes the cause of confrontation. A person is annoyed by something in the behavior of a colleague, or simply driven out of himself by some habit of a loved one, but he does not know how to say this so as not to spoil the relationship. Therefore, it endures and is silent. The effect is exactly the opposite. The accumulated irritation sooner or later spills out in an uncontrollable form, which can lead to a serious conflict. Therefore, it is very important not to bring to the "boiling point", but calmly and tactfully express your claims as soon as they arise.

When you shouldn't avoid conflict

But there are times when it is not worth it, because it is she who will help solve the problem. You can consciously go into conflict if:

you need to defuse the situation by finding out the sore one with a loved one;
there is a need to break off relations;
yielding to your opponent means betraying your ideals.

But we must remember that deliberately going into a conflict, it is necessary to sort things out intelligently.

Memo "How to correctly resolve the conflict"

To get out of a conflict situation as quickly as possible and with the least loss, we suggest the following sequence of actions.

1. First of all, the existence of a conflict must be recognized. Situations should not be allowed when people feel opposition and act according to their chosen tactics, but do not speak openly about it. It will not be possible to resolve such a conflict without joint discussion of the parties.

2. Having recognized the conflict, it is necessary to negotiate. They can be either face to face or with the participation of an intermediary who suits both parties.

3. Determine what exactly constitutes the subject of confrontation. As practice shows, the parties to the conflict often see the essence of the problem in different ways. Therefore, you need to find common ground in the understanding of the dispute. Already at this stage, it is important to determine whether a convergence of positions is possible.

4. Develop several options for solutions, taking into account all possible consequences.

5. After considering all the options, settle on one that suits both parties. Record the decision in writing.

6. Implement the solution. If this is not done right away, the conflict will only deepen and it will be much more difficult to renegotiate.

We hope that our tips will help you, if not avoid conflicts, then get out of them with dignity.

In the modern world, it is difficult to do without conflicts. A conflict can happen with anyone, anywhere, anytime: at home, at work, in a store, on public transport, and even on the Internet (although, it would seem, what to share with strangers?).

The slightest minor conflict can ruin your mood for the whole day. And it is very difficult to hide from others, and therefore you can easily ruin the mood of others. This can lead to a series of new conflicts. But forewarned is forearmed. Having studied in more detail the specifics and causes of conflicts, you can try to avoid them.

What is conflict

Conflict is an intractable contradiction. This is a situation in which each side seeks to take a position that is incompatible and opposite to the interests of the other side.

pre-conflict stage
open conflict
completion
post-conflict period

Family conflicts

Family conflicts can be divided into 3 types:

conflicts based on unfair division of labor (- Why didn't you take out the trash? - Why should I take out the trash?)
conflicts based on the lack of satisfaction of any needs (- Why don't you cook anything? - Why didn't you buy me a fur coat?)
quarrels over lack of upbringing (uncivilized behavior at the table of one of the partners, words used by one of the partners that the other does not like)

Causes of family conflicts

Let's turn to statistics. A survey was conducted among 266 American family counselors. As a result, among others, problems were identified, due to which conflicts and disagreements most often arise in married couples. It …

difficulties in communication - arise in 86,6% married couples
problems related to children and their upbringing - in 45,7% steam
sexual problems - have 43,7% steam
financial problems - have 37,2% steam
leisure - at 37,6% steam
relationship with parents - at 28,4% steam
adultery - have 26,6% steam
household - at 16,7% steam
physical abuse - 15,7% steam
other problems - at 8,0% ... steam

The main thing, when conflicts arise, is to understand how to behave in such situations, and not to let conflicts spoil your relationship. Here are some patterns of behavior:

adaptation (agree with a partner, have an opinion, but not express it)
avoidance (avoiding a conflict situation)
cooperation (an attempt to come to a compromise, a joint solution that satisfies both parties)

It is important to recognize that there is a conflict in the family - this is the first step towards solving the problem. Then, you need to discuss with family members possible ways to resolve the conflict and choose the best one. If you cannot resolve the conflict on your own, then the best solution is to contact a family psychologist. The qualified help of a psychologist will definitely not hurt you.

With conflicts in the work collective, things are somewhat different.

Conflicts are possible for several reasons:

labor-related
related to human relationships
due to unfairness of the employer, according to subordinates

There are several steps to resolve such conflicts:

understand the cause of the conflict
find out if there is a secondary cause of the conflict (after all, often the main cause of the conflict is just an excuse to go to open confrontation)
find ways to resolve the conflict
make a mutual decision to get out of the conflict
eliminate the causes of the conflict
and the final step - reconciliation of the parties

Any conflicts in the team fall on the shoulders of the employer. After all, productivity decreases when the relationship is tense in the team. Conflicts disorganize workers. People begin to think more about the conflict that has occurred, rather than about work. Therefore, the employer himself must first of all try to resolve the conflict between employees.

But if a conflict occurs with the employer himself, then the problem is much more serious. Such conflicts by mutual consent are resolved much less often: only 62% of conflicts between employers and subordinates are resolved. In such cases, it is important to think about other people's interests, but also not to forget about your own. In general, it is not for nothing that they say that it is better not to argue with the authorities. Of course, when it comes to hurt pride, when reputation and professional status are at stake, it is difficult to control yourself and not respond to provocations. But once you avoid conflict, you will understand that negotiating and compromising is much more pleasant and effective. You just need to give yourself a clear message: "Work is not a place for conflicts and clarification of relationships!"

Summing up, it can be noted that any conflicts badly affect our mood and our health. Remember, nerve cells regenerate very, very slowly. And when a person is angry, he produces the hormone of aggression - norepinephrine, and when he smiles - the hormones of happiness serotonin and.

It is also important to remember that you should never go beyond the framework of this conflict and weave past disagreements and resentments to it. Otherwise it will accumulate like a snowball, and each time it will be more and more difficult to get out of the conflict. Remember to weigh the pros and cons. Indeed, sometimes the game is simply not worth the candle, and it is better to give in than to waste time arguing. We need to pull ourselves together. Better to just move the conversation to a different topic, or move the conversation to another time. Perhaps the cause of the conflict will already become irrelevant, and it will be exhausted. Most small conflicts after a while seem to us meaningless and ridiculous. Try to distract yourself, let go of the situation, and think of something good and enjoyable. Always remember the famous Confucius quote “The best war is the one that was avoided”.

Conflict books

If you are studying conflicts, books and specialized literature that you can read are presented below. Here is a short list of books that you can read to improve your conflict avoidance and resolution skills.

Coran, Goodman - "The art of bargaining or everything about negotiations"
Lixon - "Conflict. Seven Steps to Peace"
Egides - "Labyrinths of communication or how to get along with people"
Schwartz, Gerhard - "Conflict management: diagnostics, analysis and resolution of conflicts"

Take care of your family and friends, maintain good relationships with colleagues, try to think positively and smile more often!

Undoubtedly, in the life of every person there was a moment when he wanted to avoid confrontation and asked himself the question of how to resolve the conflict. But there are also circumstances when there is a desire to get out of a difficult conflict situation with dignity, while maintaining a relationship. Some people are faced with the need to exacerbate the conflict in order to finally resolve it. In any case, each of us faced the question of how to resolve the conflict or how to avoid it.

First of all, you need to understand that the conflict is a completely normal state of the individual. All the time, while a person is realizing conscious life activity, he is in conflict with other people, groups of individuals or with himself. That being said, if you master the skills that help you understand how to resolve conflict, you can significantly develop and strengthen personal and professional relationships. Resolving social conflicts is a pretty serious skill that can be very useful.

Many people have no idea what kind of conflicts they are involved in, and even more so they do not understand the true causes of conflicts. As a consequence, they cannot manage them effectively. In time, unresolved conflicts between personalities will one day lead to intrapersonal conflicts and rather undesirable consequences. Unfulfilled desires and eternal experiences can cause health problems. In addition, they often spoil character and turn a person into a loser dissatisfied with everything in the world, pushing a person down the social ladder. If this prospect is far from attractive to you, you should carefully understand how to resolve the conflict if it arises. There are many ways to resolve conflicts, so you can easily master the most necessary skills.

Let's see what a conflict is. In psychology, this term is defined as a collision of incompatible and oppositely directed tendencies in relations between individuals, groups of people or in the consciousness of an individual, leading to negative emotional experiences.

Based on this definition, the foundation of a conflict situation is a clash of interests, goals and perceptions. Conflict is quite obvious when people do not find agreement about their values, motivations, ideas, desires or perceptions. These differences are often trivial. However, when conflict involves strong feelings, basic needs become the basis of the problem. These include the need for security, privacy, intimacy, awareness of one's own worth or significance. Correct solution of interpersonal conflicts primarily focuses on the primary needs of people.

Experts have developed a variety of ways to resolve conflicts and recommendations regarding all possible aspects of the behavior of individuals in situations of conflict of interests or opinions. Based on the possible models of conflict resolution, goals and interests of the parties, there are the following conflict resolution styles.

The competition style is used when a person is quite active and intends to move towards resolving a conflict situation, wanting to satisfy primarily his own interests, often to the detriment of the interests of other people. Such a person forces others to accept his way of solving the problem. This model of behavior gives a chance to realize the strengths of an idea, even if someone does not like them. Among all the methods of conflict resolution, this is one of the most severe. It is worth choosing this style only in a situation when you have all the necessary resources to resolve the conflict in your favor, as well as when you are sure that your decision is correct. If speak about leadership roles, then it is periodically useful for him to make tough authoritarian decisions, which in the future will give a positive result. Of all the methods for resolving conflicts, it is this style of behavior that most effectively teaches employees to obey without excessive ranting, and also helps to restore faith in success in difficult situations for the company.

In most cases, rivalry implies a fairly strong position. But it so happens that such a model of behavior is resorted to due to weakness. Often this happens when a person's hopes for victory in a current conflict melt away, and he seeks to prepare the ground for kindling another. As an example, we can consider the situation when the younger child deliberately provokes the older one, receives the well-deserved "reward", and then immediately complains to the parents from the position of the victim. In addition, there are situations in which a person enters into a confrontation solely because of his stupidity, not realizing what consequences this or that conflict will have for him. However, most likely, if a person reads this article, he is unlikely to deliberately find himself in such a disadvantageous situation for himself and will choose this particular one among all in special situations.

The style of evasion due to weakness is often used when the potential loss in a particular conflict is significantly higher than the moral costs associated with "flight". At the same time, flight may not always be some kind of physical action. People in leadership positions often evade making a controversial decision, while postponing or postponing an unwanted meeting or conversation indefinitely. As an excuse, the manager can talk about the loss of documents or give useless tasks related to collecting additional information on some issue. Oftentimes, the problem only gets more complicated, so you shouldn't avoid conflicts in this way too often. Do your best ways to resolve conflictschoose this one when it really suits you.

It's quite another matter when this style of behavior is resorted to because of strength. It was then that such a method was absolutely justified. A strong personality can use time to their advantage in order to gather the necessary resources in order to win the conflict. At the same time, you should not deceive yourself and convince yourself that you are not really afraid of an aggravation of the conflict, but only wait for the right moment to resolve the situation in your favor. Remember that this moment may never come. Therefore, this style of conflict resolution should be used wisely.

The adaptation style is that a person acts guided by the behavior of other people, while not striving to defend his own interests. In such a situation, he recognizes the dominance of the opponent and concedes victory in the conflict to him. This pattern of behavior can be justified when you understand that by giving in to someone, you are not losing much. It is recommended to choose from all the ways of resolving conflicts the style of adjustment when you strive to maintain a relationship and peace with another person or group of people, or if you understand that you were still wrong. You can use this behavior model when you do not have enough power or other resources to win a given conflict, or when you realize that victory is much more important to your opponent than to you. In this case, the subject practicing the adaptation style seeks to find a solution that will satisfy both conflicting parties.

The use of this strategy due to weakness is used when it is impossible to avoid conflict for some reason, and resistance can potentially significantly harm the person. As an example, consider the situation when you meet a group of arrogant hooligans at night in a deserted place. In such a situation, it is much wiser to choose the above-described method of resolving interpersonal conflicts and part with the phone than to get into a fight and still lose your property. However, in the second case, your health can be seriously damaged.

Considering this style of behavior in the context of business, you can analyze the situation when a new company enters the market with significantly more powerful financial, technical and administrative resources than your company has. In such a situation, of course, you can use all your forces and opportunities to actively fight a competitor, but the likelihood of loss remains very high. In this situation, it would be more rational to try to adapt by finding a new market niche or, in extreme cases, selling the company to a stronger player in the market.

The strength adjustment strategy is used when you are aware of the pitfalls that your opponent will face if they insist. In such a situation, you allow the other person to “enjoy” the consequences of their actions.

The style of cooperation implies that the subject seeks to resolve the conflict for the sake of his interests, but at the same time does not ignore the interests of the opponent and tries with him to find ways of a favorable outcome of the situation for both. Typical circumstances in which this style is used include the following: both parties have the same capabilities and resources to resolve a problem; the solution to the conflict is beneficial to both parties and no one wants to get away from it; the presence of interdependent and long-term relationships between opponents; each of the conflicting parties is able to clearly explain their goals, express thoughts and come up with alternative ways out of the situation. Resolving social conflicts in this way may be the most acceptable.

Cooperation by virtue of strength takes place when each side has enough time and energy to find more significant common interests than those that caused the conflict. After the opponents come to understand the global interests, you can start looking for a way to jointly realize the interests of a lower level. Unfortunately, in practice, this method of conflict resolution is not always effective due to its complexity. . The process of resolving a conflict in this way requires tolerance on both sides.

Collaboration through weakness resembles accommodation. However, those who practice this style are often called collaborators or traitors. Such a strategy can be effective if no obvious changes in the balance of power of the conflicting parties are foreseen in the future.

The compromise style implies that opponents seek to find a solution based on mutual concessions. This strategy of behavior of the conflicting parties is appropriate when they want the same thing, but at the same time believe that it is impossible to achieve this at the same time. As an example, consider the following situations: the parties have equal resources, but there is a mutually exclusive interest; a temporary solution can suit each of the conflicting parties; both opponents will be satisfied with the short-term gain. The compromise style is often the optimal or even the last possible method of conflict resolution.

The main ways to resolve the conflict

All existing methods of conflict resolution can be divided into two groups: negative methods (types of struggle, the purpose of which is to achieve victory for one side) and positive methods. The term "negative methods" is used in the sense that the result of the conflict will be the destruction of the relationship of unity of the parties involved in the confrontation. The result of positive methods should be the preservation of unity between the conflicting parties. This includes various types of constructive competition and negotiation.

It should be understood that methods of conflict resolution are conventionally divided into positive and negative. In practice, both methodologies can harmoniously complement each other. Moreover, the term “fight” in the context of conflict resolution is rather general in terms of its content. It is no secret that the negotiation process often includes elements of struggle on some issues. Likewise, the tough struggle between the conflicting parties in no way precludes negotiating on specific rules. It is impossible to imagine progress without the creative competition of old and new ideas. Moreover, both conflicting parties pursue one goal - the development of a certain area.

Despite the fact that there are many types of struggle, each of them has common features, since any struggle involves the interaction of two subjects, in which one interferes with the other.

The main condition for victory in the event of an armed struggle is the achievement of unequivocal superiority and concentration of forces at the point of the main battle. A similar technique characterizes the main strategy of other types of wrestling, which, for example, is the game of chess. The winner is the one who can concentrate the pieces in the place where the decisive direction of the attack on the opponent's king is located.

In any struggle, you should be able to choose the right field of the decisive battle, concentrate your forces in this place and choose the moment to attack. Any method of struggle implies a certain combination of these basic components.

The main goal of the struggle is to change the conflict situation. This can be achieved in the following ways:

Influencing the opponent, his defense and situation;
A change in the balance of power;
False or true information of the enemy about his intentions;
Obtaining a correct assessment of the situation and the enemy's capabilities.

Various methods of struggle apply all these methods in different combinations.

Let's take a look at some of the methods that are used in the struggle. One of them is achieving victory by gaining the necessary freedom of action. This method can be implemented by such techniques: the formation of freedom of action for yourself; restricting the freedom of the enemy; the acquisition of more favorable positions in the confrontation, even at the cost of the loss of certain benefits, etc. For example, in the process of a dispute, the technique of imposing on the opponent those in which he is incompetent can be very effective. Thus, a person can compromise himself.

Quite effective is the method of using one conflicting side of the opponent's reserves for its own benefit. Forcing the adversary to take actions beneficial to the other side can be excellent techniques that demonstrate the effectiveness of the method.

An important method of struggle is the primary disabling of the main control centers of the conflicting complexes. They can be leading individuals or institutions, as well as the main elements of the opponent's position. During the discussion (here without the art of public speaking It is difficult to manage) it is actively practiced to discredit the leading representatives of the opponent's side and refute the theses of their position. For example, in the process of political struggle, a fairly effective method is to criticize the negative traits of leaders, as well as to demonstrate their failure.

The main principle of resolving any conflict is efficiency and timeliness. Nevertheless, in the process of struggle, the delaying method, which is also called the “procrastination method”, can be used quite successfully. This technique is a special case when the appropriate time and place for the final blow is chosen, as well as the creation of a favorable balance of forces.

A slow transition to decisive action may be appropriate when it is necessary to concentrate significant resources to achieve victory. The aphorism “time works for us” clearly describes the main essence of this method. If we talk about the discussion, then this method implies the desire to take the floor last, when all opponents have spoken. In such a situation, there is a chance to present arguments that were not seriously attacked in previous speeches.

The procrastination method has been used for quite some time. Plutarch described a case when this style was applied by the Roman dictator Sulla. When he realized that he was surrounded by significant enemy forces, he invited the second consul, Scipio, to his negotiations. After that, long conferences and meetings began, at which Sulla each time postponed the adoption of the final decision. At the same time, he corrupted the morale of enemy soldiers with the help of his cunning assistants. Scipio's warriors were bribed with money and other valuables. As a result, when Sulla's troops approached Scipio's camp, the soldiers went over to the side of the dictator, and the second consul was captured in his camp.

Avoiding wrestling is also a fairly effective method, which is partially related to the previous one. In this case, the process of resolving the conflict occurs in the style of evasion. It is used in a number of cases: when the task of mobilizing resources and forces for victory has not been resolved; to lure the opponent into a trap prepared in advance in order to gain time and change the situation for a more profitable one.

Positive methods of conflict resolution primarily include negotiations. When a particular emphasis is placed on negotiations as part of a conflict, the parties seek to conduct negotiations from a position of strength in order to achieve a one-sided victory. It goes without saying that this kind of negotiation only leads to a partial resolution of the conflict. At the same time, negotiations are only an addition to the path to victory over the opponent. In the event that negotiations are viewed as a method of conflict resolution, they take the form of open debates, implying mutual concessions and partial satisfaction of the interests of both parties.

The negotiation method, based on some principles, can be characterized by four fundamental rules, each of which constitutes an element of negotiations and is a recommendation for their conduct.

Separate the concepts of "negotiator" and "subject of negotiations". Since anyone who is involved in a negotiation has certain character traits, it is not worth discussing an individual person, as this introduces a number of emotional barriers. IN criticism process of the participants, the negotiations themselves are only exacerbated.
Focus on interests, not positions, since the latter can hide the true goals of the negotiators. At the same time, interests often lie at the heart of conflicting positions. That is why it is worth focusing on the latter. It is worth remembering that opposing positions always hide more interests than those reflected in the positions themselves.
Consider conflict resolution options that are beneficial to both parties. Interest-based bargaining encourages participants to seek a mutually beneficial solution by analyzing options that will satisfy both parties. Thus, the debate takes on the character of a dialogue “we versus the problem” instead of a discussion in the format “I versus you”.
Search for objective criteria. Consent must be based on criteria that are neutral towards opponents. Only in this case the consensus will be fair and lasting. Subjective criteria lead to the infringement of one of the parties and the complete destruction of consent. Objective criteria are formed on the basis of a clear understanding of the essence of the problem.

The fairness of the decisions made directly depends on the procedures for resolving conflicts, such as resolving disputes by drawing lots, delegating decision-making to a third party, etc. There are many variations of the latter style of conflict resolution.

Remember that high emotionality in the process of conflict resolution is a barrier on the way to its successful resolution. The ability to effectively resolve social conflicts directly depends on your skills, such as:

Calmness and resistance to stress. Such personal qualities will allow you to more coolly assess verbal and non-verbal communication.
The ability to control your behavior and emotions. If you know how to do this, you will always convey your needs to your opponent without undue annoyance or intimidation.
Ability to listen and pay attention to the words and expressions of other people.
The realization that all people cope with a given situation differently.
Ability to avoid abusive behavior and words.

To get these skills, you need to develop stress resistance and the ability control your emotions... So you will feel comfortable on ways to resolve conflictsdifficult level.

What else you need to know about conflict resolution

Incomplete solution of interpersonal conflicts leads to their renewal. However, you should not take it as a detrimental action, since not every conflict can be resolved the first time. For example, political parties are in constant battles that do not stop for many years throughout their entire existence.

Conflict can be seen as an opportunity for development. If you can resolve the conflict in the relationship, then trust is rewarded. You have the confidence that your relationship will not collapse from various troubles.

If a conflict looks intimidating to your eyes, it means that you subconsciously expect it to not be resolved in a mutually beneficial way. For many, conflict in relationships looks like something dangerous and frightening. In some cases, it can indeed be traumatic, especially if life experiences have left you feeling powerless and out of control. In this case, you come into conflict with a sense of threat and, accordingly, cannot resolve it qualitatively. In most cases, you will make concessions or, conversely, get angry.

Everyone, if desired, can effectively use these conflict resolution methods... However, an individual may have one of the most commonly used conflict resolution styles. Depending on how energetic and active a person is, he chooses one or another strategy. You can choose the optimal conflict resolution styles that are right for you.

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Key questions on the topic:

Conflict concept

Types of conflict and conflict situations

Phases of conflict development

Conflict resolution strategy and tactics

Negotiation as a way to resolve the conflict

1. The concept of conflict

The conflict is determined by the fact that the conscious behavior of one of the parties (personality, group or organization as a whole) causes disorder of interests of the other party that generates a responsenew opposition.

Cause of conflictslies, first of all, in the fact that each employee has his own goals, aspirations and interests, just like the organization. At the same time, the achievement of individual goals must be linked and coordinated with the goals of the entire organization (especially if the organization is corporate). In the process of achieving the goals of the organization and solving individual tasks by employees, conflicts can arise between them.

Disruption of interests of one side is often caused by the use of power by the other side. Lack of recognition of power is one of the most important features of the conflict. For example, the manager informs the employee about the need to go to work on the day off, which violates his plans. If a subordinate does not fulfill the order given to him, a situation may develop that negatively affects the effectiveness of joint activities, which will lead to a conflict.

A strong conflict is accompanied, as a rule, by the development of stress among its participants, a decrease in the level of cohesion and unity in the team, the destruction of the communication network, etc.

Causes of conflicts.In the most general form, these reasons can be divided into three groups: 1) arising in the labor process; 2) caused by the psychological characteristics of human relationships; 3) due to the personal characteristics of the organization's employees.

The main source of conflict situations for many organizations is work-related reasons . Among them are factors that prevent people from fulfilling their duties. For example, the direct relationship of workers who negatively affect each other in the technological chain; failure to fulfill functional duties in the "manager - subordinate" system, which does not provide the proper conditions for the successful activities of subordinates, etc.

Conflicts in the work process are also caused by factors that impede the achievement of goals such as high wages, favorable working and rest conditions. For example, unresolved organizational issues, in which the resource allocation system is violated; interconnection of people in which the earnings of some depend on the effective work of others.

Finally, conflicts are often generated by the inconsistency of the actions of one of the employees with the norms and values \u200b\u200bof life accepted in the team. For example, a mismatch in the expectations of subordinates regarding the behavior of their manager in the distribution of powers or remuneration based on performance.

The second group of reasons that give rise to conflicts and reflect psychological characteristics of human relations , should d include mutual likes and dislikes of people leading to their compatibility and incompatibility. Accordingly to these reasons, an unfavorable psychological atmosphere may develop in the team, called the “atmosphere of intolerance”.

The third group includes the causes of conflicts, which are rooted in the identity of the collective members. In this case, we mean not only a person's inability to control their emotions, aggressiveness, excessive anxiety, etc., but also socio-demographic characteristics. For example, women tend to have a higher frequency of conflicts associated with their personal consumption (vacations, bonuses, wages, etc.), while, as for men - directly with labor activity. With an increase in the age of employees, the proportion of conflicts associated with organizational problems of activity (violation of labor discipline, inconsistency of the quality of work with the requirements, etc.) decreases.